I listened to a beautiful podcast yesterday (The Next Right Thing with Emily P. Freeman — check it out!) that discussed how it is totally OKAY to not be into the whole trend of new year reflections, resolutions, and anticipation. However, like Emily, I LOVE it all! Recaps, overviews, “best-of’s”, goal setting, etc. Although I don’t usually set resolutions for myself, I love to hear about what my friends and family are planning for a new year. Because it’s a new decade now, I have loved reading about all my friends have done and accomplished through the past 10 years.
Like many people, 2019 was a difficult year for my family and I. Probably our most difficult year to date. Because of that, I’ve felt like I haven’t had much to add to the conversation of reflection or planning for the new year. I don’t want to complain, and I also don’t want to put too much pressure on myself for the future. Yesterday I also read some of my journal entries from the end of 2018 and the very beginning of 2019. I had a lot of plans and hopes that did not come to pass in 2019.
Well, that’s not true. I had a lot of plans and hopes that did not come to pass in 2019 IN THE WAYS THAT I EXPECTED.
In November of last year I wrote,
“I want my time in Japan to be an offering to you, God. Help me to recognize the mission you have for me there.”
At the time I wasn’t thinking that my mission would be to grow, deliver, and care for another precious little boy. However, that was exactly what God had in mind.
A year ago I would have said the worst thing that could have happened to me would be to get pregnant. Now I absolutely cannot imagine life without my Ezra. And now I also realize that I do have something to add to the discussion of what I’m looking forward to and planning for in the coming year. Because even if what happens doesn’t look the way I expect, God is still creating beauty from the ashes.
So, in 2020 I am:
- Letting my gray hair grow. No more dye. This is totally vain and unimportant, but still a HUGE step for me.
- Focusing on “Home”. This was my word for 2019. We moved to a new continent and I wanted to make a lovely, comfortable, and loving environment for my family. Instead, I didn’t even finish unpacking last year. Now, as we prepare to move back to Italy THIS MONTH, I know I’m not finished with this focus.
- Doing a topical Bible study on “Home” (temporary and eternal) and biblical womanhood.
- Writing more.
What are you reflecting on from the past year or decade? What are you looking forward to in 2020? Please share with me in the comments, include links to your posts if you’ve got them!
“For we know that if our earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal dwelling in the heavens, not made with hands.”
2 Corinthians 5:1
“Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.”
Psalm 127:1
“These all died in faith, although they had not received the things that were promised. But they saw them from a distance, greeted them, and confessed that they were foreigners and temporary residents on the earth. Now those who say such things make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. If they were thinking about where they came from, they would have had an opportunity to return. But they now desire a better place – a heavenly one. Therefore, God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.”
Hebrews 11:13-16
Danna, I came across your blog today. I was hesitant to share but, read this and some of the others -beautiful writings. You truly are so gifted in many ways! You truly are inspiring. I’ve always felt that way. The first time I saw you at a base. You actually were crying. I remember in that moment I could feel those tears myself. I wanted to just go hug you but, I didn’t know you and didn’t want you to be uncomfortable. 😆 I can totally relate to a timing of a baby too. I asked God to grow my capacity and didn’t know it would mean carrying a baby. That’s not what I had in mind. God certainly knows better doesn’t He!? Heehee. I understand the tension of goal setting and not goal setting too. I love Emily’s podcast.. I’ve discovered her recently and she puts language to a lot of what I think and feel.
You are such a beautiful strong person! I’m a fellow Enneagram 4 but, ENFP not INFP. I understand. I hear you, I see you. I also understand not wanting to accept being a 4. Self awareness is such a helpful thing as we navigate this life journey. It’s helped me so much through the years. We all grow in that. But, ultimately thankful we are not bound to any test good or bad but, all can be changed as we renew our minds in Christ. His word has the ultimate authority to define and say who we are.
I truly have then and do now believe in you. I have and will continually pray for you as the Father places you upon my heart.
Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.
Cheering you in your race!
With love,